Why marriages end in divorce:
1. Unrealistic expectations about marriage in the first place and a lack of normative understandings about the nature of marriage and the challenges of life that couples and families face.
2. Differing basic life values.
3. Lack of full commitment to making the marriage work. Commitment is the glue that holds a couple together while they work through their differences.
4. The marriage becoming non-sexual.
5. An extra-relational affair.
6. Conflict over fertility issues-either an unwanted pregnancy or infertility. It is crucial that sex issues-both building a comfortable, functional couple sexual style and dealing with sexual problems and conflicts be addressed in pre-marital programs and marriage enhancement programs
7. There may appear to be several reasons that contribute to a couple’s decision to separate, but typically the common thread is the inability to effectively communication and a lack of conflict resolution skills. When conflict arises, the approach to handling it is often “Me against you”, versus “Us against the issue”. This creates a division in their partnership causing them to begin working less as a team and more as individuals. If communication is already difficult, then the differences over finances, child rearing, where to live, or even what to eat for dinner, causes the couple to feel their problems are even more insurmountable. Without help, they will often see divorce as the only option.
8. Parent child relationship dynamic.
9. Stonewalling.
10. Not making the spouse a priority.
